Teen Dating Violence

The following is part of the information provided by the Crime and Violence Prevention Center of the California Attorney General's Office. Brochures on this subject may be obtained through your local police office. Teachers may wish to have this information posted in their classrooms. Although dating usually begins in the grades beyond middle school, the authors have seen eighth grades students form relationships before they begin high school. The subject of relationships is appropriate as part of the social skills curriculum.

Teen dating violence is similar to adult relationship violence. Both include yelling, hitting, threatening and other forms of verbal, sexual, emotional and physical abuse. Ten percent of all teen couples is affected by dating violence.

Signs of Teen Violence

  • Student withdraws from school activities
  • Student behaves as if ashamed or secretive
  • Student is inexplicably hostile toward family, parents or teachers
  • Student's partner calls several times a night or comes to the house to "check up"
  • Student apologizes for partner's behavior
  • Student stops hanging out with usual friends
  • Physical injuries or damaged personal property
  • Student has poor excuses for being late
  • Student may begin to use drugs or alcohol to escape feelings

Things to Do When Helping an Abused Teen

  • Make sure the timing is right
  • Use "I" Statements describing your feelings.
  • Have specific examples about behaviors of concern
  • Listen to the student
  • Be non-judgmental and make talking comfortable
  • Let the student have some control over making decisions
  • Be a role model of supportive relationships
  • Help create a safety plan when the student is out of school and not at home
  • Be aware that the police and Battered Women's Shelter may be a resource

    For Parents of Abusive Teens
  • Is your son or daughter possessive?
  • Does your student have an explosive personality?
  • Does your student criticize his/her partner excessively?
  • Does the student blame others instead of taking personal responsibility?
  • Does the student demonstrate abuse behavior toward family/others?

    Help and Crisis Numbers
  • Suicide/Crisis 800.833.2900
  • Grief 800.837.1818
  • Homeless 800. 808.6444
  • School Tip line 800.863.7600
  • Rape 800.670.7273
  • Child Abuse 800.646.1680
  • National Domestic Violence Hotline 800.799.7233
  • Abuse and Incest Network 800. 656.4673
  • Victims of Crime 800.VICTIMS

California Web site about Crime and Violence Prevention


See Help Telephone Number Poster